He Loves Me

I snuggle my head into his shoulder,

Feeling his muscles flex

As he pulls me closer to him.

He smells of aftershave and cooking grease

Familiarity

I breathe it in deeply

Memorizing.

I’m warm and sleepy

With him wrapped around me

And the rhythm of his breathing

Next to my ear begins to sound

Like a lullaby, soothing me to sleep,

But I know that I can only fight sleep for so long.

The bed creaks, as the pressure

Of my weight is released,

But he begs me

Not to leave tonight.

I stand, but feel his arms

Around my waist,

Pulling me back down to him.

He presses his palms into my thighs,

Pushing them up into my hips

Digging them into my waist

Cupping them around my breasts,

Pressing his weight

Onto my chest, and

I gasp for air, but try

To camouflage my innocence

Because he knows

Where to go 
And how to get there,

And naivety will get me left behind

So I follow.

He loosens his grip and moves delicately

To the back of my neck,

Lifting my face towards his.

Eyes closed

Lips open

Distracting me, while he inches

His way back down

To my hips, maneuvering through

The obstacle course of

Belt, button, and zipper

Like the expert that he is.

His fingers snake their way

Into the waist of my jeans.

I think that I’m supposed to say something

Alluring or do something

Sexy but I don’t know

And I’m afraid

I grab his wrist to stop him

To tell him ‘no’ but

 I need time to think and

I don’t know

I don’t know

I don’t know

He doesn’t give 
me time to think before

I feel him in me

And I close my eyes

And I turn my head

And I wait

And listen as he says

That it’s okay

Because he loves me.